I'm on my 26th and I still cannot figure out what lies ahead of me...(Well, who can?). I once thought I'm going to get this and that. I once thought I'm gonne be this and that, and I sometimes end up the other way even if all the forces I use should lead to the things that I wanted to happen. This only proves that if it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be and it's never gonna happen.
I can tell that I'm a lovaholic type of person. I fall in love easily with someone whom I just like at first, and I reject people easily and friend zone them when I can't imagine being with them for a long time.
So now, shouldn't I be thankful for what I already have? Huh? I once had the ideal guy, the ideal husband and the ideal father of my intended future kids...Ideal in terms of responsibility, ideal in terms of fun and ideal in terms of security, but there's a lot of 'buts' . It turned out that commitment is not there and that there's no such thing as ideal. It's only in line with the norms of people around us that we should have someone ilke this and like that. The question is, should it really matter ? Isn't love enough? We heard of the song line that, sometimes love just ain't enough. Maybe because it isn't true love at all so it will never be enough and so he left me. I shouldn't be bitter with that because God gave me someone new to love me for who I am not for what I have and what I can give.. (if I'm not mistaken..)
What if what you had now is the other way around? Emotionally committed to your relationship but you cannot be sure in terms of security and responsibility? Does it really matter? Wouldn't be worth trying since you're not in that situation yet? That I'm not sure if he would be a good husband and a responsible father to his family?
All I wanted was a simple life. But I need the security both emotionally and physically. Loving someone doesn't mean neglecting yourself at all and giving everything to the other person. But it also doesn't mean you have to be that selfish in terms of your needs and wants in life. You always have to both take care of yourself and your loved one.
I can tell that I am a very understanding person. As long as I can see that the person knows their responsibility, I am giving them the freedom to do what they wanted to do. But if they'll be abusing it, that's a different story.
Just a recent thoughts though, maybe I'm with a BOY... and still not a MAN...
I want a MAN not a BOY.
Related to my old blog all about boys... Any thing but boys
I can tell that I'm a lovaholic type of person. I fall in love easily with someone whom I just like at first, and I reject people easily and friend zone them when I can't imagine being with them for a long time.
So now, shouldn't I be thankful for what I already have? Huh? I once had the ideal guy, the ideal husband and the ideal father of my intended future kids...Ideal in terms of responsibility, ideal in terms of fun and ideal in terms of security, but there's a lot of 'buts' . It turned out that commitment is not there and that there's no such thing as ideal. It's only in line with the norms of people around us that we should have someone ilke this and like that. The question is, should it really matter ? Isn't love enough? We heard of the song line that, sometimes love just ain't enough. Maybe because it isn't true love at all so it will never be enough and so he left me. I shouldn't be bitter with that because God gave me someone new to love me for who I am not for what I have and what I can give.. (if I'm not mistaken..)
What if what you had now is the other way around? Emotionally committed to your relationship but you cannot be sure in terms of security and responsibility? Does it really matter? Wouldn't be worth trying since you're not in that situation yet? That I'm not sure if he would be a good husband and a responsible father to his family?
All I wanted was a simple life. But I need the security both emotionally and physically. Loving someone doesn't mean neglecting yourself at all and giving everything to the other person. But it also doesn't mean you have to be that selfish in terms of your needs and wants in life. You always have to both take care of yourself and your loved one.
I can tell that I am a very understanding person. As long as I can see that the person knows their responsibility, I am giving them the freedom to do what they wanted to do. But if they'll be abusing it, that's a different story.
Just a recent thoughts though, maybe I'm with a BOY... and still not a MAN...
I want a MAN not a BOY.
Related to my old blog all about boys... Any thing but boys
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